Relationship, Couples & Sex Therapy in San Diego
Relationship Therapist & Couples Therapist in San Diego | Online Therapy Across California
Not sure whether you need couples therapy, sex therapy, or individual relationship therapy?
We’ll help you figure out the best next step.
You do not have to know exactly how to explain what is happening.
Many clients start with discomfort, avoidance, shame, or confusion — and therapy helps put language to it.
Relationships Redefined is a relationship therapy practice founded by Dr. Nikki Nolet, PhD, LMFT, CST, an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist. We specialize in couples therapy, marriage counseling, sex therapy, premarital counseling, and individual relationship therapy. We serve clients in San Diego, Del Mar, Carlsbad, Encinitas, La Jolla, North County San Diego, and online throughout California.
Healthy relationships rarely happen by accident.
They grow through understanding, communication, emotional safety, and intentional effort.
At Relationships Redefined, therapy focuses on helping individuals and couples better understand the patterns shaping their relationships, so they can communicate more clearly, reconnect emotionally, and build deeper intimacy.
Work with Dr. Nikki Nolet, PhD, LMFT, CST — an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and relationship expert helping individuals and couples improve communication, rebuild intimacy, navigate conflict, and create stronger emotional and sexual connection. In-person therapy in Del Mar and Carlsbad, and online therapy throughout California.
If you’re ready to better understand the patterns shaping your relationships, therapy can help
Hi! I’m Dr. Nikki Nolet, Sex Therapist and Couples Expert in San Diego
Sex, intimacy, conflict, communication and love - I’m here for it all. Working with couples and individuals in relationships is my whole focus in my practice.
What does that mean for you?
It means that when you work with me, you are working with a relationship therapist and certified sex therapist who is highly trained and effective in working with couples and individuals who want to navigate conflict, prepare for marriage, rebuild intimacy, or simply want to understand their relationship patterns more deeply.
I offer couples counseling, sex therapy for couples, men and women, and individual relationship therapy as well as premarital counseling.
Relationships Redefined offers in-person therapy in Del Mar and Carlsbad, serving clients throughout San Diego County, including Encinitas, La Jolla, Solana Beach, Oceanside, Vista, San Marcos, and North County San Diego. Online relationship therapy, couples therapy, and sex therapy are available throughout California.
Your Relationship Is Stressing You Out
You want your relationship to work but you are scared that if you really open up and show your true emotions, that you’ll end up being rejected. You’ve had painful relationships in the past and really don’t want to repeat those patterns again. You wonder if you are capable of having that deep connection that you long for and you worry that you might spend your life in relationships that just feel unfulfilling and empty.
You’ve tried to stop repeating patterns from the past, trying new ways of saying something or approaching a conflict, but it feels like no matter what you try, you miss each other and the conflict simply amps up more. You feel vulnerable but you also feel emotionally disconnected from each other.
You need more intimacy, physically and emotionally, you just don’t know how to get there. You’ve almost forgotten how juicy and sexy it feels to be desired, completely connected and confident in your relationship.
Learn how relationship therapy or couples counseling can make a difference in how you feel, how you connect, and how you love.
Couples and Sex Therapy Services in San Diego & Online Throughout California
For couples stuck in repeated conflict, emotional distance, communication breakdowns, betrayal recovery, intimacy concerns, or the painful feeling of living more like roommates than partners.
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Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling in San Diego
For couples stuck in conflict, emotional distance, communication breakdowns, intimacy concerns, or repeated arguments that never fully resolve.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling available throughout California.
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Sex Therapy in San Diego & California
For individuals and couples navigating desire discrepancy, low libido, erectile concerns, painful sex, orgasm difficulties, sexual shame, performance anxiety, or avoidance around intimacy.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online sex therapy available throughout California.
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Individual Relationship Therapy
For people who want to understand relationship patterns, attachment wounds, dating fatigue, people-pleasing, anxiety in relationships, or repeated painful dynamics.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online individual therapy available throughout California.
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Premarital Counseling in San Diego
For couples preparing for marriage who want to strengthen communication, clarify expectations, discuss sex, finances, conflict, family dynamics, and long-term compatibility.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online Premarriage Therapy available throughout California.
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Sex Therapy for Women
Sex therapy for women can help address concerns around desire, arousal, orgasm, painful sex, sexual confidence, body changes, hormonal transitions, relationship dynamics, and feeling disconnected from your own sexuality. At Relationships Redefined, sex therapy for women is thoughtful, collaborative, and grounded in helping you better understand your body, your needs, your relationship patterns, and the emotional blocks that may be impacting intimacy.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online sex therapy available throughout California.
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Sex Therapy for Men
Sex therapy for men can help with concerns such as performance anxiety, erectile difficulties, premature ejaculation, low desire, sexual shame, porn or compulsive sexual behavior concerns, emotional disconnection, and difficulty talking about sex in relationships. At Relationships Redefined, sex therapy for men offers a direct but supportive space to understand what is happening, reduce shame, improve communication, and rebuild confidence in intimacy.
In-person sessions are available in San Diego County, with online sex therapy available throughout California.
Focused Support for Couples Who Want More Than a Weekly Session
Not every couple needs the same kind of support. Some couples benefit from ongoing couples therapy, while others need a more focused way to reconnect, learn tools, or work through a specific relationship pattern.
Relationships Redefined offers couples intensives and couples workshops for partners who want dedicated time to strengthen communication, deepen intimacy, and better understand what keeps getting in the way.
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Couples Intensives Online or In San Diego
For couples who feel stuck in repeated conflict, emotional disconnection, intimacy concerns, or major relationship decisions, a couples intensive provides more time and focus than a standard weekly session. This private, personalized format allows us to slow the pattern down, understand what is happening beneath the conflict, and practice new ways of communicating and repairing in real time.
Best for couples who want private, personalized, deeper relationship work in a concentrated format with meaningful momentum.
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Couples Workshops
Couples workshops offer a structured, educational experience for partners who want practical communication tools, guided exercises, and intentional time to reconnect.
A couples workshop can be a good fit whether your relationship feels strong and you want to deepen it, or you know there are patterns you want to change before they become more painful or entrenched.
Best for couples who want relationship education, practical tools, and a shared experience outside weekly therapy.
Why Work With Dr. Nikki Nolet?
Dr. Nikki Nolet, PhD, LMFT, CST is an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist specializing in relationship therapy, couples therapy, and sex therapy. Her work integrates advanced training in couples therapy, sex therapy, attachment, communication patterns, desire discrepancy, and intimacy repair.
AASECT Certified Sex Therapist
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
PhD-level clinician
Specialized focus on couples, sex, intimacy, and relationship patterns
In-person therapy in San Diego County and online therapy throughout California
Featured in Salon, AskMen, The Girlfriend, UpJourney, and Imago Relationships resources.
Specialized Relationship and Sex Therapy Expertise
Relationships are not simply one part of my practice—they are the central focus of my work. My approach brings together advanced training in couples therapy, sex therapy, attachment, desire, communication, and intimacy repair. Rather than forcing every couple into one model, I draw from multiple evidence-informed approaches to create a process that fits your relationship, your history, and the changes you want to make.
Want to know what relationship therapy can impact?
You Don’t Have to Wait Until Your Relationship Is in Crisis
Couples often seek help after conflict, disconnection, resentment, or avoidance has become deeply established. Getting support earlier can make it easier to recognize the pattern, communicate more openly, and rebuild emotional and physical connection before frustration becomes the relationship’s normal rhythm.
You do not have to be considering separation to benefit from couples therapy. Therapy can also help you protect what is working, understand each other more deeply, and create healthier ways of navigating the challenges ahead.
Your relationship does not have to be one of these statistics. That’s why I created Relationships Redefined. Click the video below to learn more about how we can work together to help you create the relationship you desire.
Ready for better in your relationship? Click below to book a free consult.
What to Expect When You Get Started
Your first step is a complimentary 15-minute consultation where we briefly discuss what is bringing you to therapy and determine which service may be the best fit. Depending on your needs, you may begin with a 50-minute individual session, a 90-minute couples session, a focused couples intensive, or an upcoming couples workshop.
Therapy is collaborative and tailored to your goals. You do not need to arrive knowing exactly what is wrong or how to explain it—we will begin by helping you identify the patterns, concerns, and changes that matter most.
Wondering if Relationship Therapy is right for you?
We Help With:
Communication & Conflict
Recurring arguments, emotional shutdown, defensiveness, resentment, repair after conflict, difficulty expressing needs.
Sex & Intimacy Concerns
Low desire, mismatched libido, erectile difficulties, orgasm concerns, painful sex, sexual shame, anxiety around intimacy, lack of sexual confidence.
Trust & Relationship Repair
Infidelity, betrayal, mistrust, emotional disconnection, feeling like roommates, rebuilding safety after rupture.
Individual Relationship Patterns
Relationship anxiety, dating fatigue, people-pleasing, choosing unavailable partners, feeling “not good enough,” fear of rejection, old patterns that keep repeating.
Premarital & Life Transitions
Preparing for marriage, conversations about sex, finances, family expectations, religious or cultural differences, and future planning.
As a relationship and sex therapist in San Diego, CA, I help people uncover what is stopping them from truly connecting in their relationships and feeling wanted, desired, and connected with their partners or themselves.
I won’t just sit and nod my head. We will collaborate to figure out what really makes sense for you. There are no cookie-cutter solutions here, as life is never that simple. BUT…there are so many tools and strategies to support you AND I bring my intuition with years of experience to help direct you to the right thing at the right time so you can get where you want.
Tired of just typing into Google “couples therapist near me”?
You don’t want to work with just any therapist, you need someone who really is skilled at working with relationships, sex, intimacy and communication. I understand that you are busy, and that finding time in your day can be difficult to find the right therapist. Check out more about how you can find a dynamic therapist and know that the therapist you choose is perfect for your relationship
Dr. Nikki Nolet has contributed relationship and intimacy expertise to publications including Salon, AskMen, The Girlfriend, UpJourney, and Imago Relationships.
Featured In:
A Relationship-Centered, Integrative Approach
Therapy at Relationships Redefined is active, collaborative, and personalized. Our work may incorporate attachment-based therapy, Imago Relationship Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy, evidence-informed sex therapy, mindfulness, nervous-system regulation, and practical communication exercises. We focus not only on what you argue about, but also on the underlying emotions, protective responses, unmet needs, and relationship patterns that keep the conflict going.
Ready to Create Something Better in Your Relationship?
Whether you are struggling with communication, emotional disconnection, intimacy, sexual concerns, or patterns that keep repeating, you do not have to figure it out alone. Schedule a complimentary consultation to explore the kind of support that may be right for you.
FAQs
What type of therapist should I see for relationship problems?
A relationship therapist can help individuals and couples understand the patterns affecting communication, trust, intimacy, conflict, and emotional connection. At Relationships Redefined, therapy focuses on both the emotional and relational dynamics that keep people stuck.
Can sex therapy help if we have mismatched libidos?
Yes. Desire discrepancy is one of the most common reasons couples seek sex therapy. Therapy helps couples understand what is suppressing desire, reduce pressure and shame, and rebuild intimacy in a more collaborative way.
How do I know whether to book a 50-minute or 90-minute session?
Couples often benefit from 90-minute sessions because there is more time to slow down conflict, practice communication tools, and work through emotional or intimacy patterns without feeling rushed.
Do we need to be in crisis to attend a couples workshop?
No. Couples workshops can be helpful for couples who are doing well and want to deepen their connection, as well as couples who want better tools for communication, conflict, and intimacy.
Do you offer couples therapy in San Diego?
Yes. Relationships Redefined offers couples therapy in San Diego, with in-person sessions in Del Mar and Carlsbad and online couples therapy throughout California.
Do you work with individuals or only couples?
At Relationships Redefined, we work with both individuals and couples. Individual relationship therapy can help with relationship anxiety, dating patterns, emotional avoidance, people-pleasing, sexual confidence, and understanding repeated relationship dynamics.
What is the difference between couples therapy and a couples workshop?
Couples therapy is typically ongoing and personalized to the specific dynamics, history, and concerns of one couple. A couples workshop is usually more structured and educational, giving couples tools for communication, connection, and repair in a focused format.
Are couples intensives a replacement for weekly couples therapy?
Sometimes, but not always. A couples intensive can help create momentum, clarify patterns, or support a couple through a focused issue. Some couples continue with ongoing therapy afterward, while others use intensives periodically as deeper relationship work.
What is the difference between couples therapy and sex therapy?
Couples therapy focuses on communication, conflict, trust, emotional connection, and relationship patterns. Sex therapy focuses on intimacy, desire, sexual functioning, shame, anxiety, pleasure, and physical or emotional barriers to sexual connection. Many couples benefit from integrating both approaches, particularly when emotional and sexual concerns are affecting one another.
Do you offer online therapy in California?
Yes. Online therapy is available throughout California for relationship therapy, couples therapy, premarital counseling, and sex therapy.
Who is a couples intensive best for?
A couples intensive may be helpful for couples who feel stuck, disconnected, overwhelmed by recurring conflict, or unable to make enough progress in shorter weekly sessions. Intensives create more time to slow down the pattern and work more deeply.
Online Therapy in San Diego and Throughout California
No more having to worry about commuting, traffic and finding parking – we’ve got you covered with online therapy in California.
We provide relationship therapy to individuals and couples throughout San Diego, including Carlsbad, Encinitas, Del Mar, La Jolla, and across California through secure online therapy sessions.